A Pastor’s Mistress; How To Avoid Being One

imagesSome women lust for men just as much as some men lust for women.

However, it’s deeper than that.

Some women lust for the pastor as much as some pastors lust for women in the house of worship.

In the church, there are many women looking for “love.”

This is code for “sex.”

Many will not own up to it, nor admit it, but this is the bottom line.

Pun intended.

Few women know how to avoid a good looking single or married pastor. Even when the pastor is walking in the Word to maintain his sanctification, there’s some un-sanctified women that will cross the line.

Younger women should learn well from sanctified women of God how to avoid the pitfalls of pastoral sexual immorality with congregants.

I’ve seen it happen to a man of God. A seductress came in and wrecked his home and church. Because of unbridled lust in his heart, he succumbed to an evil woman, and the rest was history.

In almost every generation, we hear of horrid stories of pastoral sexual misconduct but few of us look at the other side.

The mistress covertly comes and goes. Nothing is hardly ever mentioned because sometimes the woman is made out to be the victim. As pure as heaven. However, if you look closely in the Scriptures, you will see that the book of Proverbs uncovers several kinds of wicked women.

Immoral,

seductress,

crafty harlot,

loud and rebellious,

boisterous,

evil/wicked woman,

adulteress,

religious or form of godliness,

whore.

Their house is the staircase to hell, the Bible says. See Proverbs 5:5, 7:27.

Here is some very helpful information in the Word of God to help women avoid this danger that lurks in the flesh.

As in previous blogs, we know that pastors take advantage of emotionally unstable women. However, we must remain focused on this issue because of sin. The Lord Jesus lovingly confronted sexual sins among women when He was at Jacob’s well, when the woman that was caught in adultery was brought to Him, when Jesus cast seven devils out of Mary Magdalene, and another sinful woman that cried tears on the feet of Jesus and she wiped them away with her hair, for her sins were many.

In each instance, it wasn’t condemnation but Jesus was ministering to them to deliver them.

We all know that it’s not just the woman but the men with lust in their hearts.

Part of the mystique of women is their ability to make it seem like it’s not the way it looks.

Hence, the need to “beautify.”

The need for “makeup and false eye lashes and eye brows.”

The need to “nip and tuck.”

The need to “smooth it over.”

The need to “flatten the tummy, push up the cleavage, and firm up the backside.”

These things cover a multitude of faults and sins.

Pastor, this verse is for you.

Proverbs 6:25 “Do not lust after her beauty in your heart, nor let her allure you with her eyelids.”

Attire of a harlot does happen in church services, every Sunday. Praise and worship, prayer, preaching. It doesn’t matter. There is no fear of God before their eyes. If people were afraid of God, people would not do the things they do. And “saved” folk wouldn’t wear what they wear; like as if they were going to the club.

Proverbs 7:6-10 says “For at the window of my house I looked through my lattice, And saw among the simple, I perceived among the youths, a young man devoid of understanding, passing along the street near her corner; and he took the path to her house In the twilight, in the evening, in the black and dark night. And there a woman met him, with the attire of a harlot, and a crafty heart.”

The opposite is modest apparel.

1 Peter 3:3-4 says this about wives, but it is also applicable to women in general. “Do not let your adornment be merely outward — arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel — rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.”

1 Timothy 2:8-10 says “I desire therefore that the men pray everywhere, lifting up holy hands, without wrath and doubting; in like manner also, that the women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with propriety and moderation, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or costly clothing, but, which is proper for women professing godliness, with good works.”

Low cleavage body hugging dresses, tight pants, stilettos, sleeveless blouses, above the knee dresses is not “modest apparel.”

These things masks the reality and attracts the dogs in the house of worship.

You could always tell the kind of person they are by their conduct. No matter how pretty they look, their conduct is the reality. Look past the smooth words and you will see the real person emerge. Look past the beauty and you will never be deceived.

If some women would own up to it, the Lord could help them avoid the obvious. With single pastors it’s one thing. But a married pastor is a different story.

The ring on a pastor’s ring finger doesn’t mean much to the passive hunter looking to be a home and church wrecker. The shame is not too great. Let’s get past the shame and focus on what the Word says.

As a born again woman that loves the Lord, it is important that you grow in your love for the only Man that should be King in your heart.

The Lord Jesus Christ.

THE LOVE FOR GOD

In Luke 10:27, Jesus said “So he answered and said, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your strength, and with all your mind,’ and ‘your neighbor as yourself.’”

Jesus was quoting from Deuteronomy 6:4-6 that says “Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one! You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. “And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart.”

To abstain from lusting after being the pastor’s mistress, your love for God must be unadulterated.

Listen to what the Lord said about loving the Father.

John 14:15, 21 “If you love Me, keep My commandments.  He who has My commandments and keeps them, it is he who loves Me. And he who loves Me will be loved by My Father, and I will love him and manifest Myself to him.”

If you claim to love the Lord, a moment of lust throws your alleged love for God down the drain.

All sin is committed when person no longer loves the Lord. Doesn’t matter if you are saved or not. To cheat on God is the first step to all sin. It means that even though the Lord could satisfy the longing in your heart, you long for that which is forbidden. This is what happened to Eve in the Garden. Adam gave her what the Lord said but she looked for a way to have that which was forbidden.

It was a combination of the desire for power and the desire to have what you were told not to have.

For some women, even though they were told that they cannot have a married man, it isn’t enough. To accomplish the goal of having a married man you must stop loving the Lord.

To reverse this, you must get into the place of prayer and fasting to suppress the mind and body.

Then you must read some Scriptures to help you subdue the flesh.

MAKE NO PROVISIONS FOR THE FLESH

Romans 13:13-14 “Let us walk properly, as in the day, not in revelry and drunkenness, not in lewdness and lust, not in strife and envy. But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to fulfill its lusts.”

ABSTAIN FROM FLESHLY LUSTS

1 Peter 2:11 “Beloved, I beg you as sojourners and pilgrims, abstain from fleshly lusts which war against the soul,”

As a note, the word “abstain” means to “hold oneself out.” Or to hold out.

SUBDUE AND DOMINATE YOUR FLESH

1 Corinthians 9:26-27 “Therefore I run thus: not with uncertainty. Thus I fight: not as one who beats the air. But I discipline my body and bring it into subjection, lest, when I have preached to others, I myself should become disqualified.”

FLEE FORNICATION

1 Corinthians 6:18-20 “Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s.”

GUARD YOUR HEART

Proverbs 4:23 (AMP) “Keep and guard your heart with all vigilance and above all that you guard, for out of it flow the springs of life.”

GUARD YOUR EYES (WATCHING TV)

Psalm 101:3 (AMP) “I will set no base or wicked thing before my eyes. I hate the work of them who turn aside [from the right path]; it shall not grasp hold of me.”

KEEP YOURSELF

1 John 5:18-19 “We know that whoever is born of God does not sin; but he who has been born of God keeps himself, and the wicked one does not touch him. We know that we are of God, and the whole world lies under the sway of the wicked one.”

WALK IN THE SPIRIT

Galatians 5:16-17 “I say then: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh. For the flesh lusts against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; and these are contrary to one another, so that you do not do the things that you wish.”

SANCTIFICATION

1 Thessalonians 4:1-5 “Finally then, brethren, we urge and exhort in the Lord Jesus that you should abound more and more, just as you received from us how you ought to walk and to please God; for you know what commandments we gave you through the Lord Jesus.
For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you should know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in passion of lust, like the Gentiles who do not know God;”

SUBMIT TO GOD & RESIST THE DEVIL

James 4:7-8 “Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you.”